I was also getting metaphorically kicked in the butt to find a husband. I know right? Why?
I was a strong and fairly independent woman by this point. I was happy. I was doing a world of good for many people. Helping them with their own paths and healing processes. Continuing to move forward with my own.
Life was good. And I kept fighting the impulse. For starters I kept getting the push to join E-Harmony. It’s a great dating site, but it’s a tad expensive.
And I wanted to be sure that if I joined it was going to pan out pretty fast. I didn’t have a lot of funds to keep it going for months at a time.
I finally decided to join Dec 31, 2015. Two days later a I got my first wink/smile or whatever it was. He and I went through the initial process. Questions, make or breaks, etc. And we found we had enough in common. So we started emailing. Through E-Harmony of course.
I had a few others contact me, but they all wanted women who aren’t overweight. What is that all about? Just seems plain weird to me to judge whether or not you’ll be happy with someone based on how they look.
But I’ve always been one to see the beauty of the soul over the beauty of the body. I mean the body changes. The soul changes too, but usually in ways that make it more beautiful as time goes on and the soul grows and expands.
So this first guy and I really started to hit it off. We shifted to actual emails as well as texting. And then we decided to meet.
And I was more nervous than I’ve ever been in my life. I actually had a mild panic attack and an asthma attack when I came out of my last massage session of the day and saw the text saying he was coming up.
He was half way to my city, (we lived an hour apart for the first 7 months), by the time I got the text. I kept myself as collected as possible, got my client out of the building, and closed the office since I was the last one out.
I called my best friend in a total panic. I had on ragged clothes, because I either biked or rode a moped to and from work at this time. And there was no point soiling my work clothes when I had to have mild to no body odor.
She helped me calm down enough to go home and change then head back down the street.
Well, we hit it off and things progressed and I started to understand how to love a man in a romantic way.
This was all new and strange for me.