Finally free. And that thought reverberated through every aspect of my being every time I healed from some deep trauma.Every time I let go of someone or something or an experience. I was free and becoming more free all the time.
The new problem became finding and developing aspects of my Self enough to fill in what I had just excised. Its a truth that one must replace some negative or detrimental behavior with something more positive and benevolent. I learned this lesson quite well as I vacillated between moving forward and returning to old habits and thought patterns.
The knowledge that everything has an opposite was also brought home to me quite clearly. I also started to learn that everything I thought was bad and horrible and made me unworthy could, if utilized properly, bring me healing, joy and closer to understanding myself and life and people and God etc.
I started to become quite good at finding these correlations and learning how to learn. I ceased the self flagellation and moved on to trying to find the lesson.
Now remember this was a very long process. I was well into year three or four of trying to heal at this point. The introduction into energy sped things up quite a bit for me, but it would still be about a year and a half before I really sorta got the hang of utilizing these new abilities. Meditation was vital in learning more about it.